Recently, I had my first-ever podiatrist appointment. My left knee and foot have been troubling me since the beginning of the year and although my knee had finally improved, my foot did not follow suit, so I needed it checked by a professional.

At the start of the appointment, the podiatrist reviewed my medical history and running background. I explained that I began running at the end of 2018 and have undergone a significant transformation, losing 80kg since February 2017 and that it’s now been nearly five years since finishing my weight-loss journey. When asked about my maintenance journey, I explained that I stopped weighing myself at the end of 2021 and have no idea what my current weight is, but I manage my weight by exercising and eating well. I no longer wish to worry about or focus on the scale.

The podiatrist listened attentively and then said something that made my day: “Well, I think you are perfect just as you are.” Those words were so unexpected yet incredibly uplifting.

In our journey towards self-improvement, we often focus on internal validation—building self-esteem, confidence, and resilience from within. We usually have to cheer and motivate ourselves. While this is undeniably important, there are moments when external validation, especially from a stranger, can profoundly impact for various reasons.

Firstly, it’s an affirmation from an unbiased source. A positive affirmation from someone with no preconceived notions about you or vested interest is sincere and objective. Hearing something like that reinforced the effort and dedication I am already putting into maintaining my health.

Such validation can also serve as a powerful motivator. Despite the occasional setbacks, I felt a renewed determination to continue on this path.

External validation can also help shift our perspective and significantly boost our self-esteem. We often become our harshest critics, focusing on perceived flaws rather than achievements. A stranger’s positive remark can help us see ourselves in a more balanced and compassionate light.

Many years ago, a friend told me that her mother always advised her to be generous with her kindness but selective with her friendships. We don’t need to be everyone’s best friend, but we can be generously kind, even to strangers.

When last did you compliment a stranger?