Future-fit?

There’s one appointment on my calendar each year that I look forward to more than almost any other: my annual photoshoot.

This year was my fourth. And because we do them around the same time each year, they’ve become a kind of reflection point for me. A chance to notice not only how I’ve become more comfortable in front of the camera, but sometimes how I’ve grown in other ways too.

This time, Tamryn asked if her university intern could join us. Of course I agreed. She also mentioned that her intern preferred “they” rather than “he” or “she.” It was something I hadn’t encountered personally before, but I thought I’d manage just fine.

It turned out to be harder than I expected.

Initially, I wondered whether it was simply because English isn’t my first language. But the more I thought about it, the more I realised I probably would’ve struggled in Afrikaans too.

The intern, though, was a delight. They worked hard, listened carefully, asked thoughtful questions, picked out earrings and outfits with flair, and soaked up every opportunity to learn. Watching someone so eager reminded me of what it’s like to stand at the beginning of a journey.

Yet I left the photoshoot feeling disappointed. Not because anyone expected perfection from me — but because I had expected it from myself.

On the drive home, I kept circling back to a phrase I often hear at work: “future-fit.” It sounds impressive, as though one day, if we read enough books, attend enough courses, and embrace enough change, we’ll finally be ready for whatever comes next.

But I’m not sure it works like that.

I’ve never been ready for the things that changed my life.
I wasn’t ready to write.
I wasn’t ready to lose weight.
I wasn’t ready to run.
I certainly wasn’t ready for most of the technology I’ve had to learn.

I became ready by doing. By making mistakes. By asking questions. By trying again.

Looking back now, my pronoun slips aren’t what I remember most. I remember an experienced photographer investing in someone at the start of their career. I remember an intern eager to learn their craft. And I remember realising that I still have things to learn too.

Maybe that’s what matters.

Not being future-fit — which feels like a destination.
Just remaining open, teachable and willing to try.